RESTORATIVE QUESTIONS

Use this Circle Facilitator Guide with students, teams, and community members to practice asking and answering Restorative questions to learn how to build healthy, authentic relationships with others.

Welcome to the Space of the Circle.

• MINDFULNESS MOMENT Pause, breathe, and listen to the sound.

• OPENING

“How good it is to center down!

To sit quietly and see one’s self pass by!

The streets of our minds seethe with endless traffic;

Our spirits resound with clashings, with noisy silences,

While something deep within hungers and thirsts for the still

moment and the resting lull.”

- Howard Thurman

• INTRODUCE "ROUNDS" A "round" is a pass of the talking piece around the Circle. The keeper poses a question and, as a participant, may answer first. The keeper then passes the talking piece to the person to their left or right (or names the next person over Zoom). On the first round, participants are invited to say their name and pronouns as well as respond to the question. Remember, it is always okay for a participant to pass.

• Remind the group of Circle values and guidelines. These can be ones established in previous circles or be created new each time with new participants. Some helpful sharing guidelines may include:

  • Share what you feel comfortable sharing.

  • Respect the talking piece

  • You can pass at any time.

  • Be mindful of time.

  • Respect the privacy of those sharing.

  • Trust intent/name impact

  • Use “I” statements

  • Speak from the heart/listen from the heart

  • Be here now

  • Prioritize connection before content

  • Be both teachers and learners

  • Have fun!

• ROUND Share your name, pronouns and what brought you to this circle today.

• ROUND What does the word “community” mean to you?

• ROUND How do you typically respond when something goes wrong/against expectations in your community or personal relationships?

• LEARN Reflect and learn on the following video:

RESTORATIVE QUESTIONS (IIRP):

​RQ1: WHEN CHALLENGING BEHAVIOR: What happened? What were you thinking of at the time? What have you thought about since? Who has been affected by what you have done? In what way have they been affected? What do you think you need to do to make things right?

RQ2: TO HELP THOSE AFFECTED: What did you think when you realized what had happened? What impact has this incident had on you and others? What has been the hardest thing for you? What do you think needs to happen to make things right?

• PRACTICE

  • Think about a time in your life when someone let you down, made you upset, or didn’t fulfill a shared expectation.

  • Partner A will share their story

  • Partner B will ask Restorative Questions II (RQ2) and pause for response for each question.

  • Partner B will share what resonated with them and an affirmation

• ROUND How did it feel to ask or be asked these questions?

• ROUND What are some scenarios where these questions could be useful?

• CHECK-OUT ROUND Share either something you’ve learned, something you’re surprised by, or something you want to learn more about

• CLOSING

"It is the questions that change our life. We all look for answers and all we get in

response is more questions. This is why questions confront in ways that statements

and answers don’t. And why questions are essential for the restoration of

community."

– Peter Block

• Thank everyone for participating in the Circle!

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